You Don’t Have to Go it Alone: The Power of a Guide
“There’s no right way, there’s only YOUR way.” -My Life Coach, Michelle
2019: The Year of Understanding Continues…
Jump ahead to Tool #3 below if you’re all caught up! Or, get quickly caught up here:
Just joining us on this 2019 journey of growth? Here are a few resources to get you all caught up!
1. Ditch the Resolutions and instead set out on a journey to understand yourself.
2. Bring a good map! One based on YOUR unique brain wiring.
3. Growing in big ways might get uncomfortable…but growth is always bred in a container of discomfort. Self-care can make the journey a lot less painful and a lot more nurturing.
4. Channel your inner tortoise by holding your vision for the future and not being afraid of the slow or uncharted path. The hare always gets ahead, but in the end it’s the tortoise that wins the race.
We’ve collected some pretty important tools for our journey thus far: a good personalized map plus the all-important practices of self-care. Today, we find our way back to our list of tools, adding one more vital tool for such a major journey…
Tool #3: The Guide
The “Right” Way
Getting things “right” was something that I was always getting hung up on.
Back in 2008, I wanted to start a business. It felt important to do this the “right” way, so I signed up for an 8-week “How to Write a Business Plan” course with a local women’s organization.
I toiled away for weeks on what was supposed to be some sort of 30-40 page business plan masterpiece because I felt that I had to. I didn’t know there was any other way. (This tended to be a recurring theme in my earlier days…).
It’s not even as much that I didn’t know there was another way – it’s that I didn’t know other ways were even allowed. But I never finished the business plan. Instead of it being the thing that launched me forward, it became the thing that held me back.
In 2010 I again wanted to start a business. This time I decided to really give my time to it and I took off a whole month from work to completely dedicate myself to this project.
What I mostly remember about that time was feeling like I couldn’t ever stop, or pause, or take a deep breath. I thought that if I was going to create my own business, then I couldn’t stop because then the business would stop and the whole point was to get the business moving forward.
About two weeks in I started having mysterious gut symptoms, and a week later I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease. Six months later with my health mostly under control I took off another month from work and gave it another go. The Crohn’s flared up so badly I ended up back in the hospital.
In 2013 the Crohn’s disease came out of a two-year remission. I researched and researched and came up with what I thought was the holy grail of “putting a disease back into remission” plan – the Autoimmune Protocol.
Oh, the AIP was strict all right, but I wasn’t one to do things half-assed (see perfectionism). So I plunged in full force cutting out all grains, dairy, nuts, seeds, beans, legumes, eggs, nightshades (like tomatoes, eggplant and peppers), vegetable oils, alcohol, and chocolate. The first question I was usually legitimately asked upon hearing this was…what CAN you eat?
There was actually plenty that I could eat as long as I was willing to make everything at home from scratch – like, oh you want a tortilla? Bake it from scratch using pulverized plantain pulp. (Which honestly…is delicious…but the point is that making everything took forever).
My food and cooking creativity went through the roof entirely through necessity. I would spend hours preparing meals because I was determined to DO THIS and do it well.
But it also sucked a lot of joy and easy-going-ness from my soul. I didn’t feel like me anymore. But I forged ahead determined as ever that this was the “right” way to cure my disease. After 8 months of strictly following the rules, I ended up needing near-emergency surgery for a perforated intestine and an abscess so large it had its own medical name (phlegmon, anyone?).
And we don’t even need to start on my childhood history of K thru college perfectionism in school, all culminating with having to work for free for my first job out of college.
Clearly this desire to do things “right” wasn’t serving me.
But while I was so busy getting things “right,” I wasn’t paying attention to the fact that I wasn’t all that happy. Oh sure, I experienced happiness. But nothing like that childhood joy I can so clearly recall.
The joy of getting up in the morning, not showering, putting on my favorite orange t-shirt with the sparkle dolphins and running outside to play with my best friend all day. Man, I can remember that feeling SO CLEARLY. (I also REALLY loved that orange sparkle dolphin t-shirt).
But somewhere along the way I realized that life had become heavy and difficult and not very fun. When you’re a little kid, you can’t wait to become a grown-up and do whatever you want all the time. But instead, life had become an endless to-do list and a myriad of health issues.
Initially I went online in search of a business coach. Someone who could help me stop the endless spinning of ideas in my head and get me onto the path of actual business creation. But instead I found Michelle. And I thank the universe every day that I did!
Michelle Stimpson is my Life Coach. We embarked together on what was supposed to be a 9-month journey, but accidentally ended up spanning 3-years due to my crazy health issues.
When I stumbled upon her website, I knew I had found something special. This was a grown-up who had figured out that life can, in fact, be just like you imagined it could be as a little kid. It can be fun, it can be joyful, and it sure as hell doesn’t have to be so heavy.
I read every word of her website, I poured through her blog, I talked it over with my family, and then I signed up for her longest program. I still had aspirations of her being my “business coach,” but instead she gave me so much more. She coached me on life.
One of the most important lessons I learned from Michelle was something she had to tell me over and over (and something I still tell myself constantly): there’s no right way, there’s only YOUR way.
I needed someone to drill that into my head, to undo the decades of programming I had been telling myself; to realize there’s not just a right way and a wrong way; to give myself permission to do things MY way; to realize that even if my way was sometimes kind of weird, it wasn’t wrong, it was perfect.
I was always terrified of everything not being perfect – yet, I’ve never found life in being perfect, I’ve found it when everything falls madly apart.
In 2017 I again decided to start a business. This time I wrote a 2-page business plan. I savored taking my time. My health never flared up. I found two delightful weirdos (enter the Buckley siblings) to help coach me on business strategy and marketing. We rarely follow whatever the rules are – instead they help to keep me on track, in touch with my innermost self, and far away from the “shoulds” and “rights.”
Thanks to my earlier work with Michelle, I also pay attention now to things that feel “heavy;” I shift, I reassess, I get curious.
We can make it far in life on our own, but guides/coaches/mentors open doors for us that we never even knew existed.
Life is too short to not milk it for every last ounce of happiness, wholeness, joy or fulfillment. Life is also too long to not milk it for every last ounce of happiness, wholeness, joy and fulfillment.
Honestly, what have you got to lose?
And you stand to gain far more than you ever imagined possible.
As I wrote in my testimonial for Michelle after our time working together came to an end (and apparently I’ve always really loved metaphors about journeys and tools…):
“We wouldn’t embark on an important journey without all the appropriate gear, and what Michelle did for me is not only help guide me down a more fulfilling path, she equipped me with the necessary tools to keep me heading down this path with confidence and ease. I can easily say that working with Michelle was one of the best decisions I have ever made!”
I wouldn’t be doing this work now as a Personal Growth & Holistic Wellness Coach if I didn’t completely believe in the power of it.
But my life was enriched a thousand-fold when I made the decision to embark on my own journey with a trusted guide by my side.
Even the best and most-skilled mountain climbers will still rely on guides and helpers to assist them on their journey.
If you’re feeling called to the inner work of self-understanding and personal growth, know that this might be your Everest (or maybe your Kilimanjaro) and there’s no shame in reaching out and partnering with a trusted guide. In fact, it’s just good mountain climbing practice!
I personally offer a number of Personal Growth & Holistic Wellness Coaching Programs in suggested 3, 6, and 9-month durations with a lot of flexibility and options to personalize based on your timeline, needs and budget. You can find all the info on my Coaching Programs HERE or I encourage you to set up a free call to ask questions and learn more HERE.
Or, one of the simplest (and definitely most fun) ways to jump into coaching with me is by setting up a single 3-hour Personality Discovery & Coaching Session – it’s the perfect way to test the waters and see if we’d make a good team (more info on that below!).
Remember, what have you got to lose?
Maybe you’ll even look back and realize that hiring a guide was one of YOUR best decisions ever.
I know for me, it absolutely was.
Personality Discovery & Coaching Session
Your #1 Tool on Your Journey of Growth
“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it’s ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.” – Einstein
- A Personality Discovery & Coaching Session is the perfect way to dip your toes into the waters of personal growth without a big commitment.
- Myers Briggs 2.0: enough with the fluff! Most people don’t go deep enough with Myer’s Briggs – don’t stop before you get to the good stuff.
- No test, quizzes, or assessments. Live interview and calibration with a Certified Personality Profiler to find your best-fit type. Learn about the Cognitive Functions and how your brain is uniquely wired to learn and make decisions. Discover your unique brand of genius.
- 3-hours of face-to-face time (in-person or long-distance) involving an interview, explanation of your profile, and personalized coaching around your most pressing goal or challenge.
- A deep-dive into understanding your behaviors, motivations, and unique brain wiring.
- Information on how to leverage your strengths and manage your blind-spots.
- Clarity, understanding, and direction to apply to all aspects of your life including health, career, relationships.
Receive personalized answers to these questions:
- What is my flow state?
- How can I best energize myself?
- What’s my biggest blind spot?
- What’s my fighting/conflict style?
- What’s the most effective type of R&R for me?
- How do I encourage myself towards personal growth?
- And more..!
A Gateway to the Soul
How do we access something as intangible as the soul? We will use this Myers Briggs 2.0 method as a map to help us remember who we are meant to be, or maybe to discover it for the very first time.
When we are living out of alignment with our true selves, our soul is out of alignment. When the soul is broken, we are broken, and this can manifest in very physical and tangible ways.
We will use this method of soul rediscovery to begin to bring both body and soul back into alignment and into a state of peace where we can access the ability to heal and reclaim our innate wholeness.
Let this be your map as you journey up your mountain of growth this year!
“The Personality Discovery Session I completed with Angela was a much needed guided journey into my soul and psyche. It is so much more than a typing session. Angela did help me understand my cognitive type, but in the process of doing so I had multiple moments of that feeling of connecting with my true authentic self. It is absolutely an invaluable experience.” –Lani Hanson
Truly understanding yourself is the MOST important tool in any journey of personal growth.
Contact Me Here with Questions or to Schedule Your Session!
Long-distance? No problem! Sessions typically done via Zoom